Losing Weight after a Baby

To me, its easier to work on changing my identity and thoughts than just habits. If you change your actions but not your identity/beliefs/way you view yourself, then it takes so much willpower. The whole thing is hard, you don't have much of a compass besides the WW app telling you how many points are left. When you get to your goal weight you have all this anxiety about gaining the weight back because you still see/believe/feel that you are your old heavier self. You don't know how to act in a situation with food.

When you change your identity there is no crisis at the goal line. Instead you were expecting this result and just continue in the habits you built around your new identity.

This post is all about Lucia changing her identity from:

Mom who is too overwhelmed and busy to lose weight

to

Mom who prioritizes her self care, who is so busy that the weight just comes off on its own.

I seem to think that after having a baby, 20 lbs should instantly come off. But really for me its only 10 pounds. Seems unfair because of those 10 pounds, 7 of them pounds were Mr. Thomas. The math just doesn't seem right...

The first few weeks after baby are all about Treat yoself! Recovering from birth I want coffee, muffins, peanut m&ms, all the sweets. No boundaries, no limits.

Thomas is around 2 weeks here

During pregnancy its a bit of a honeymoon phase with your weight/ appearance.

Obviously clothes don't fit the same but hello I'm pregnant!

You are in this safe little cocoon. If anyone says anything about when is that baby due again, you just brush it off and roll your eyes. And if someone says You look really good! you take it to heart.

Do I though?

After the baby is out, you don't have the safe cocoon around you anymore and have to face the facts.

And I know what people say...

"You just grew a human, take it easy on yourself"

"It took you 9 months to gain this weight, it will take a while to come off"

"Motherhood is amazing and you have this beautiful baby and why worry about a few pounds"

True true true

but after a baby I want to feel like LUCIA again. I need to find my identity, who am I , what do I like, what do I not like, who was I before this tiny fragile baby needed me all the time?

And I do not feel like myself when none of my clothes fit.

I do not feel like myself when my double chin is always present.

I do not feel like myself when my feet are tired and I cannot do as much.

Therefore, none of those pretty sayings about growing a human are really all that helpful.

I think I started really trying to lose the weight Mr. T was 6 weeks old.

I know that might seem early, but I start with really small steps.

Its funny because I lost the weight after my girl was born, and I have lost weight before in my life. Still the thoughts when starting out are:

"Ugh this is going to take so long."

"None of my clothes fit"

"Nothing looks good on me"

"Is this who I am forever?"

Will life go on?

Anyway. Here are the steps I took to lose weight after Mr. T was born.

I had 20 pounds to lose, 25 if I was feeling ambitious.

I started with the thought

"I love that I am the type of person who prioritizes me."

and I repeated it to myself as often as I could.

Action:	Thought:
filling up my waterbottle so I would get my daily water intake	I love that I am the type of person who prioritizes self care
taking 10 minutes out of a hectic morning to plan my food for the day	It is hard to make time for myself. But I am the type of person who prioritizes me.
bringing kids outside with me so I could do a youtube workout	I love that I am taking care of myself and my body even when its not easy. But I am the type of person who treats her body well.
Sleep training baby at a young age	I love that I am making this investment for myself. Soon I will be able to sleep through the night, which will help everything.
Going for a walk with the double stroller	I am so happy that I am the type of person who takes care of my physical and mental health.
Going back to the gym and getting the kids daycare trained	I love that I am making this investment in getting my kids used to the gym daycare. Soon I will be able to workout for an hour and they will be happy here too. This will be a benefit to all of us.
Going for a solo walk when Brad gets home from work.	I love that I take time for myself when life is stressful.

You get the point, I repeated that thought over and over and gave my brain much evidence that it was true.

This isn't an idea that just came to me, its from the podcast

Losing 100 pounds with Corinne Crabtree.

Because for me, weight loss is 99% mental and only 1% action.

I have had a lot of success with her plan/psychology

My favorite podcast of hers is called "I have so far to go" and she talks about the thoughts that can slow down weight loss.

I started by doing the 24 hour food plan she has on her website, and my first goal was just getting enough water.

I planned out food I was already eating, but just increased my water intake.

and of course kept thinking my thought, hmm what was it again?

I LOVE THAT I AM THE TYPE OF PERSON WHO PRIORITIZES SELF CARE

Not only did this thought feel good, it also kept me going, and got the ball rolling on the weight loss.

after a while, I added a new thought. I realized I had been making this weight a bigger deal than it needed to be. I felt like it was going to be hard. So I tried out a new thought

"Losing weight is easy and enjoyable"

Action:	Thought:
Weigh myself only to see no change in weight.	Weird. Losing weight is easy and enjoyable for me. I'm sure there will be a change next week.
Try on a piece of clothing that fit slightly better than before	I love this feeling! Losing weight is so fun
Plan an iced coffee with a protein bar every afternoon	I love that I enjoy the food I am eating and am still losing weight. This is so easy
Enjoying the sunshine on my face as I am going for a walk	I love this feeling! Losing weight is easy and enjoyable.
Seeing a drop in numbers on the scale	Noice! This is kinda fun

Losing weight is easy and enjoyable, and I kept thinking this thought and giving my brain evidence that it was true.

The actions I took after adding in water were

1. Move from eating sweets whenever I wanted to 3 treats a day.

2. Then 2 treats a day

3. Go for a walk daily or do a workout outside

4. Get kids gym daycare trained ( this took about a month )

5. Start going to barre twice a week once kids were good for an hour of daycare

Other steps:

6. Swap out coffee and a sweet for zipfizz in the morning. It is so hard for me to just drink coffee without pairing it with a sweet. It takes up a lot of willpower that I would rather not spend right in the morning. If I drink a zipfizz instead, I still get energy and don't have to battle myself all morning. Plus they taste good and don't get cold like coffee does.

After a few weeks of no weight loss with diligent effort, I decided to track calories. I only did it for about 3 days. This really helped me to see where I was putting in unnecessary extra calories. Like one thing I was doing was adding juice to my water to flavor it, that was an extra 300 calories a day once I did the math.

Or adding heavy whipping cream to my coffee. Wowza that stuff adds up. So I measured out a few tablespoons and kept it to that.

That really made a big difference and again I would think the thought

"Losing weight is easy and enjoyable"

after seeing a smaller number on the scale

Another thing is I planned foods I enjoyed. I did not try to convince myself that I wanted a salad for lunch everyday.

If you're thinking to yourself "I bet she's the type that just naturally loses weight" believe you me, I have never had a an easy time with weight loss. I have a long history of gaining, losing, trying different diets, feeling like a failure, etc etc but after 11+ years I finally figured out it was internal and not external things keeping the weight on. Which is why I started with my mindset when I need to lose weight this time. When I can get in the right headspace, the rest is easy. Corrine's podcast also has a lot on unhelpful thoughts and tools for this.

With these two thoughts getting more and more believable, the momentum kept going and weight was coming off.

and then when I hit my goal weight, it was exciting, I was happy, but I wasn't over the moon. I already felt good so getting to a number didn't suddenly change everything. I hadn't fantasized about what life would be like once I got to my goal weight, instead I had created my habits as I was losing weight.

There was no stress about Am I going to be able to keep it off? because I was happy with my eating/ exercise routine and didn't want to change anything.

I don't really have good before and after pictures, but I have lost 25 lbs and am back to pre baby weight.

Me and Avery doing out face lotion routine

And I feel like myself, my jeans fit, I can tell my body is getting stronger. Its a good feeling.

For now, this is something I feel like I have figured out. There's a chance in the future I am back to square one and have to figure it out all over again. But for now, I am thankful for a brain that is not consumed by food and exercise. I am thankful for a balanced diet, and a good exercise routine.

That's all for now,

Potato Farmers Wife